Reality …

People often tell each other to come into terms with reality but what does that really mean ? In a world where everyone is living their truth and moving based on their beliefs it would seem that they often mention and live in their reality to which most believe is the only reality. Today, I aim to dispel this belief as I believe there is no single reality but many pluralistically co-existing leading to one shared reality. This essay will explore how reality is a fluid construct shaped by synchronization and fragmentation, examining the conditions under which it thrives or breaks apart, and consider the implications for human coexistence. 

Reality is a shared perspective

Everyone has their perspective which is influenced by their moment in space and time — their cultural, historical and personal context. This perspective is a culmination of one’s beliefs, perception of and relationship with the material world. For an individual, this perspective is their reality. This reality exists in isolation and in perhaps the lasting embodiment of one’s individuality. When this perspective interacts with another, it becomes a dialogue – an exchange between two individuals. 

However, reality, as we understand it, reaches its fullest expression when third individual, party or collective observes and acknowledges the interactions of the dialogue between the two individuals earlier and in that moment everyone involved becomes a person. The process of becoming a person takes place due to the essence of an individual is actively being reflected, refracted, and acknowledged by others. Therefore, the difference between an individual and a person is that if an individual is just one angle of one’s essence then a person is the expression of one’s essence from multiple angles. 

Hence, a shared reality is born. This shared reality is what reality often is — a shared perspective born from the interaction and observation that converge isolated perspectives to create a collective understanding of existence. Let’s investigate further into the mechanics that form or fragment shared realities. 

Synchronization

Shared realities are formed by a process I call synchronization, the process by which perspective find common ground and align to form a shared reality. It is important to note that synchronization is not about total agreement but about creating enough alignment to coexist and collaborate. It allows individual realities to converge, leading to a collective understanding of existence. 

Synchronization is often driven by third factors — empathy, awareness and common interests. Empathy enables an individual to understand and share another’s perspective. Awareness allows an individual to consciously recognize the consequences of their or other people’s action on others required to see patterns. These patterns allow on to find similarities and differences. Finally, common interests acts as the incentive based on shared goals or values that provide a foundation for alignment.

There are varying degrees of synchronization. The most common one being the partial synchronization which involves enough agreement to coexist peacefully, often a dynamic found in diverse and pluralistic societies. Partial synchronization can turn into dynamic synchronization when alignment of perspectives collectively evolve, adapt and shift over time. What is rare is full synchronization which occurs when perspective align completely which is often found in small, tightly knit, generally homogeneous communities. Synchronizations often manifest as shared traditions that unify a group despite individual differences, agreements that allow societies to function (e.g. laws, costumes) or relationships like friendships where alignment coexists with individuality. 

Fragmentation

Shared reality can die as easily as it born which leads to what I call fragmentation, where perspective diverge to the point of isolation or conflict. Fragmentation occurs when common ground is lost or when perspectives become incompatible to which there is a peace and violent forms. Minor fragmentation (the peaceful variant) often takes place from a lack of clarity or awareness about others’ perspectives. This misalignment takes place naturally as disagreements but often the shared reality is strong enough to deal with minor hiccups. Examples of so are cultural splits, generational divides and political polarization.However, if enough minor fragmentations take place it would lead to disconnection without hostility. An example this is friends just naturally drifting apart. A minor fragmentation can turn major if one condition is met — the refusal, denial and disregard of one’s individual perspective. 

Major fragmentations take place because the refusal, denial and disregard of one’s individual perspective is inherently a violent act of refusing one’s right to exist and is the gateway towards dehumanization. This is where low grade resent is formed, if festered for a long enough time, will lead to conflict, isolation and antagonism. Due to the fact, that dehumanization is the gateway towards the elimination of a group or individual the defense of one’s reality and individual perspective becomes one of life and death. The largest manifestation of a major fragmentation is war or when death becomes the end result of the interaction. 

It is important to note that the refusal, denial and disregard of one’s individual perspective does not take place by verbal means but by one’s actions. This is the case because one’s action is the final manifestation of one’s intentions. 

If one desires to prevent fragmentation, here is my advice. In moments of disagreement make it a point to acknowledge, respect and validate others’ perspectives, even in disagreement. The worse that would happen is that the disagreement leads to a very weak minor fragmentation. Communicate openly so that you can address misunderstanding before resentment builds. Finally place empathy as the foundation of all human relations. I recommend this to foster an environment where perspectives can coexist.

In the end, synchronization and fragmentation are two sides of the same coin of shared reality. Synchronization is the glue that holds shared reality together, creating a collective understanding of existence. Fragmentation represents the fragility of shared reality, where divergence risks isolation or conflict. Together, these forces shape the evolution of reality, demonstrating its fluid and dynamic nature. 

Why bother ?

If you asked me why all what I have written matters, this is my response. By understanding the outcomes of synchronized or fragmented realities, we can prevent unnecessary suffering, pain, and death, the third most certain things in life. Shared reality shapes how individuals interact and connect with one another. Synchronization fosters trust, mutual respect, and collaboration, creating environments where people feel seen, heard, and valued. Fragmentation, on the other hand, breeds isolation, resentment, and conflict, often leaving individuals feeling alienated and misunderstood.

At the interpersonal level, the consequences of these forces are profound. A synchronized reality within a friendship or relationship builds a foundation of empathy and acknowledgment, where disagreements are navigated with understanding rather than hostility. Conversely, when perspectives are dismissed or invalidated, fragmentation takes root, causing emotional distance or, at worst, severed ties. By learning to recognize the patterns of synchronization and fragmentation, we can consciously nurture healthier connections in our personal lives.